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Writer's picturePaul and Phoebe Hoogendyk

Feminine Essence: The constant unfolding of Self!





“Your essence is what actually animates you so that if you are out of touch with your essence then you are basically pretending to be someone that you never have been.”…….or you have forgotten or hidden who you really are!

Wish we could remember where we saw this quote then we could give them credence for what we believe plus the piece we added at the end.

Our whole lifetime journey can be taken up with finding ourselves and who we truly are. In fact for some it could take an eternity. Now don’t panic just because you haven’t found your essence doesn’t mean you cannot. Finding self or your essence is a constant unfolding of layers and layers of self to finally reach the core.

Remember we are all essentially male and female within, whatever outer shell you have chosen to use, in this incarnation. The difference is men traditionally wear armour (masculine essence) and women, cloaks (feminine essence). Of course that is a very basic explanation.

So if we are looking for feminine essence and what it is, then from our Eastern traditional training, it is the yin within the yang. Therefore there is no one without the other.

Ok so what is yin? It is the more receptive, passive and nurturing side of ourselves. For women in general this is the outside self and for men it is more internal. The yang is the active, assertive fire side of ourselves: so for men it more external and for women more internal. Inside and outside need to be in balance. If either one of those is out of balance within us then we will be having problems.

With today’s push for women to be “equal” to men, some women have thrown the cloak aside and put on the armour to compete in, what is still essentially, a man’s world. For the most part the majority of people still see “softness, compassion, caring and vulnerability,” all feminine essentials, as weaknesses. Of course they are not. In essence they are our super strengths whether we are male or female. These essences bring us back to our core selves so we can assert one or other when necessary….in balance with the other…..this is the important key….”in balance with the other”

The feminine aspect is also intuition. If you lock that out you don’t know who and where you are. It is the part of us that gives “birth” to the new.

A lot of sickness is in essence the blocking of our true feelings and emotions. “If you can’t feel you can’t heal”! This is especially true for men who still run the programme of showing and expressing emotions i.e. their feminine side…is showing weakness; and for women who have gone the other way and blocked their masculine essence believing that to be feminine is to be submissive.

In short within in us all is the goddess….the balancing strength of the warrior god….and together in balance they bring us to our core selves and put us in touch with who and what we truly are…..our essence!

Follow your heart and lives your dreams.

Phoebe and Paul Hoogendyk co-owners of Ancient Pathways and co-authors of the trilogy “Set by The Ancients”.

First written for Temple Magazine October 2017

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